---
title: "How to Explain What Coaching Is: 10 Things to Avoid"
description: "Ten mistakes to avoid when you explain coaching to someone new, a simple way to say it, and how coaching differs from training, consulting and mentoring."
url: https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/how-to-explain-what-coaching-is
date: 2021-01-19
modified: 2026-10-17
author: "April Grace"
image: https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/how-to-explain-what-coaching-is.webp
categories: ["Post"]
tags: ["Best coaching posts", "coaching", "What is coaching"]
type: post
lang: en
---

# How to Explain What Coaching Is: 10 Things to Avoid

“Coaching” is still a strange word for many people. Could you explain what it is in a sentence or two? And what does it add to personal wellbeing and happiness? Here are ten tips for explaining **what coaching is** to clients (who are not yet coachees). A short version that works almost everywhere: *coaching is a process that helps or accompanies people to get results*. The rest of the definition depends on the school, the organisation or the coach’s own style.

Many people distrust what they do not know and, even when they need it, refuse to understand coaching until they try it themselves. So simplify. When you explain coaching to a stranger, try to avoid these ten things:

## 10 things to avoid when you explain coaching

1. **A textbook definition.** It can limit more than it explains. Run a quick express coaching instead: ask the person what they could do about a problem of theirs.
2. **Promising that coaching will change their life.** Not everyone needs it, and many people already coach themselves naturally.
3. **Telling them where you studied.** Ontological, systemic, NLP, Gestalt: the school you come from distracts from what matters to them.
4. **Criticising other coaches.** Do not waste energy discrediting other schools to say yours is the real one. Ego battles surprise outsiders, and they can end up hearing about the worst coaches instead of the best.
5. **Arguing that coaching is a fad.** If someone says it is fashionable, say “Great that it is fashionable! Would you like to try it?”
6. **Forgetting that they might prefer something else.** Some people want to be told what to do, and consulting or mentoring will suit them better. We dislike having music we dislike sold to us, so respect people’s tastes.
7. **Starting with the history of coaching.** Coachmen and long family trees interest very few people at first.
8. **Explaining something you have not lived.** If you have never had a good coaching process with a coach, it is hard to convey its value. Practice sessions in a course are still practice.
9. **Imposing your method.** Skip the “I’m a coach!” attitude. Your style may simply not fit what the other person needs, so be open to alternatives.
10. **Thinking your way is the only way.** There is always a better way to explain it. Listen to how colleagues do it and combine ideas.

## The way we explain it

These are general ideas, not an exact science, but simplifying always helps. We say that coaching is the process that helps people reach their dreams, or their [life purpose](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/life-purpose-exercise-find-your-purpose-in-life). Then we give one example that quickly shows the difference between training, consulting, psychology, mentoring and coaching. If it helps, we move on to the types of coaching, and finally to why coaching works.

| Approach | Who has the answers? | Focus |
| --- | --- | --- |
| Training | The trainer | Teaching a skill or knowledge |
| Consulting | The consultant | Giving expert solutions |
| Mentoring | The mentor | Sharing experience in the same field |
| Psychology | Shared; clinical expertise | Treating and understanding the mind and its difficulties |
| Coaching | The client | Reaching goals through questions and commitment |

## More on coaching

Complement your coaching sessions with Happiness Play, which helps clients take their first steps towards happiness and personal growth with coaching techniques. Start with the [best information about happiness](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/best-information-about-happiness).

### What else should you know to explain coaching?

These exercises and guides, collected over the years, will help:

1. [The best coaching exercises and tools](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/coaching-tools)
2. [A glossary of coaching terms](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/coaching-terms-glossary)
3. [From measuring happiness to managing it](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/can-happiness-be-measured)

## Try it on yourself first

The best way to explain coaching is to have done it. Start with your [wheel of life](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wheel-of-life-how-to-do-it-free-template) or a [life map](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/how-to-make-a-life-map), or look at one area at a time:

[![Professional wheel of life: work coaching exercise](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/professional-wheel-of-life.webp)Work wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/professional-wheel-of-life)

[![Family and friends wheel: family coaching exercise](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/family-and-friends-wheel-coaching-exercise.webp?v=20261017)Family and friends wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/family-and-friends-wheel-coaching-exercise)

[![Health wheel: health coaching exercise](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/health-wheel-health-coaching-exercise.webp?v=20261017)Health wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/health-wheel-health-coaching-exercise)

[![Love wheel: couples coaching exercise](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/love-wheel-couples-coaching-exercise.webp)Love wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/love-wheel-couples-coaching-exercise)

[![Money wheel: financial coaching exercise](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/money-wheel-financial-coaching-exercise.webp)Money wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/money-wheel-financial-coaching-exercise)

[![Home wheel: house coaching exercise](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/home-wheel-house-coaching-exercise.webp)Home wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/home-wheel-house-coaching-exercise)

[![Leisure wheel: free time coaching exercise](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/leisure-wheel-free-time-coaching-exercise.webp?v=20261017)Leisure wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/leisure-wheel-free-time-coaching-exercise)

[![Personal growth wheel: personal development coaching](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2026/10/personal-growth-wheel-coaching-exercise.webp?v=20261017)Personal growth wheel](https://www.happinessplay.com/blog/personal-growth-wheel-coaching-exercise)